Wednesday, June 14, 2017

I'm This Many! [Holds up 10 fingers.]

So hey, guess what?  This blog's 10!





So if you want to go modern, might I suggest a jewel-encrusted Cipollini:



Cipollini RB1K Luxury Edition from Mcipollini on Vimeo.

Or, if you're the traditional sort, how about a used Jamis?


I'm cool with either--or both!

Most years I forget my Blog-A-Versary, or my Blogular Birthday, or my Blog-Mitzvah, or whatever you want to call it, but when I realized I was closing in on a decade I decided this year would be different.  Indeed, I flirted will all sorts of celebratory ideas, including but not limited to:

  • Leading a great bike ride
  • Having a big party
  • Relaunching the whole operation on a fancy new platform complete with smarphone app
  • Quitting the whole goddamn shitshow once and for all
Alas, when it came right down to it, the unfortunate fact is that I couldn't get it together to do any of these things.  In fact, I ended up forgetting my e-decennial just like I'd forgotten the others before it, because the goddamn thing was yesterday.  And now it's too late.


Oh, get over it, mutt.

Still, it's only natural that I'd forget my big day, because at this point in my life I'm very busy.  For one thing, I'm one half of a New York City power couple.  (I'm the powerless half, every power couple needs one.)  For another, I'm the father of two (2) human children (it used to be seventeen (17) but I donated fifteen (15) of them to Recycle-A-Bicycle) and I must prepare them for life in a dystopian future.  (I've got them on a rigorous program of martial arts and computer coding.)  And then there are the community board meetings, and the public appearances, and all those great shows on Netflix, and before you know it there's hardly even time for a sub-sub-epic ride in suburbia let alone a lavishly self-indulgent birthday celebration:


Yes, these days an hour or two on the trails behind the shopping mall on what the dropper post weenies would consider an "entry level" mountain bike is pretty much as "epic" as it gets for me--and even then I usually meet the family at the mall afterwards and we do our grocery shopping at Whole Foods.

Yeah, that's right, we shop at Whole Foods.  Then we fly back to the Bronx on our private jet:


Sometimes while we're waiting on the tarmac we hail like 15 Ubers and when they show up we point and laugh at them as we take off.

Anyway, all of this is to say that while I reserve to right to engage in some sort of retrospective, commemorative event, or crass merchandise offering at some point during my tenth year, it ain't gonna happen today.

There is one thing I'd like to share with you though before I sign off for the day:


10 years ago I was a cycling rube, a New York City Fred who frittered away his carefree pre-child-rearing years by waking up early to ride around in circles with other Freds.  Then I started a blog so I could make fun of fixies.  In so doing I had the tremendously good fortune to be embraced by the cycling community and to experience all sorts of things I never would have otherwise: going on a book tour; riding L'Eroica; and falling headlong into my own urine, just to name a few.  I owe this all to the people too numerous to mention who have reached out to me over the years, as well as anybody who's ever read my blog, or my books, or any of the other stuff I've scribbled, and it's quite humbling to consider that if I hadn't started this thing I'd still be riding around in circles both literally and figuratively.  

So thank you, and feel free to knock off early today and go for a ride.

You deserve it.


--Wildcat Rock Machine



71 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yep!

Drock said...

Ok I'm riding high

Anonymous said...

And read it!

Seattle lone wolf said...

Podi!

cdinvb said...

Just off the pack. Dammit.

Seattle lone wolf said...

Damn.

Max Schlachter said...

I shall drink ten beers to commemorate this auspicious occasion! Huzzah!

Victor Kaminski said...

vsk said ...

In the tennus for the tenth !!


vsk

Bagnall said...

Happy anniversay

Gecko said...

10th on the 10th anniversary!

Mooseknucle said...

Congrats

Flip Scriptman said...

Thank you for the ten years of words. Your blog got my through 5 years at a shit job.

FR8 said...

I play the part of head of household; it's a non-speaking role. Congratulations

Anonymous said...

Snob - what a decade it's been. Thanks for the great laughs and the thoughtful stuff too.

Spokey said...


top dozen (and several more)

N/A said...

Congrats, Wildcat. 10 years in, and you still inform us and make us laugh. Of course it's also Wednesday, so that could just be the weed talking.

Thanks, dude.

db said...

Congrats, Snob. Thanks for all the great reads.

Anonymous said...

I've been reading the blog almost daily since 2009. Thank you.

dnk said...

Congrats Mr. Snob.

Also, your TA blog fucking rocks. Read it every morning.

I know cycling is your beat, but your one of the best media debunkers period. (Fake news? Marcia Kramer et al.)

Sad Puppy said...

Snoopy phone snubbed me reading your blog. But I'll get over it, cause I charged my L'Eroica epic to his credit card.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...this bolg has been going longer than most marriages.

...my relationship with this blog has been going longer than my previous marriage.

...therefore, I'm married to your blog.

...therefore, therefore, I'm happy to see you(r post) everyday... cept on weekends and holidays.

...I love you(r blog)

...yours

Serial Retrogrouch

P.S. Happy blogneversary

Anonymous said...

Thanks Wildcat. I am knocking off early for a ride right now.

boys on the hoods said...

Congrats on 10 and here's to 10 more!! Off to ride now!!

Comment deleted said...

Congratulations on your aluminum anniversary, RTMS. Thanks for all the great writing.

Philip Bey said...

Always look forward to the blog and your new work with TA. Thanks for your advocacy and sense of humor.

Tim the Artist said...

Wow, 10 years is quite a long time!! Keep it up dude! One of the few things I read every single morning when I'm having my coffee, thank you! My good friend gave me a cannabis cookie, so I will be knocking off early today, eating that, and going on a bicycular ride on the trails. In tribute I will not be wearing a helment, and I will ramble along in a leisurely manner.

crosspalms said...

Happy 10th, and thanks! I don't have any diamonds or aluminum, but here's a conversation I had with an angry fred the other day while passing a bunch of runners:

AF: On your left! On your left!! ON YOUR LEFT!!!
Me: We're passing people, you idiot.
AF: No you're not, you slow fuck!

OK, calling him an idiot was a mistake, though accurate. And in some circles, being a slow fuck is a good thing. But he could learn a thing or two by reading this blog, so here's hoping you pick up another reader.

Freddy Murcks said...

Happy belated 10th Blog Birthday, Snob (it's your fault that it's 'belated,' you slack bastard). If I'd a know'd you was coming, I'd a baked a cake (and eaten it myself).

Steely Danzig said...

10 years ago, I was new to commuting, knew nothing about fixies, freds, duders or Cipo. You have taught me a lot. Good luck with your new venture. I don't live in NYC (thank Lob) but still read the TransAlt report. Cheers.

GladImNotMerckx said...

Better belated than bleated.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations and many thanks for the blog! When I hit the Powerball, I will show gratitude. Expect a full line of Budnitz and Cipollini products to start arriving on your doorstep...

Anonymous said...

Where's that goddamned alpaca?
Did it spit at junior?

Loyal fan and reader said...

I have chuckled and laughed at loud at times reading your blog over these past several years! And for that you deserve some serious praise!

"But does it go to 11?"

In any event, congratulations, WCRM!

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Happy Aniscranusary!

Read every post since about 2009 or so. Thanks for the blogs.

Rock on WC Rock Machine.

Dooth said...

🍻

leroy said...

My dog asked me to inform you that you didn't need to produce high quality content on a daily basis for ten years in order to fall headlong into your own urine, but he's glad you did.

You know, now that I think about it, I should ask him to clarify.

Anyway, congratulations from both of us!

DB said...

Happy Anniversary and thanks for putting in the time and effort to entertain us.
I've been a reader since the Great Hipster Silk Route years and now I get the Daily Double with your TA blog.

Phildefer said...

Happy Anniversary and thanks for keeping us informed an entertained with this blog and the new TA blog. Even for non New York residents, it's a pleasure to read every day.

Anonymous said...

Congrats and all thats

Anonymous said...

https://youtu.be/9Evm2LF1uRM?t=23 – Congrats on such much years of Blogging!

(Btw. you should do something about these gruesome car-centric CAPTCHAs).

Buffalo Bill said...

Wow, ten years. That went by like a methamphetamine-addicted rabbit on a tarmac sl4. Your blog has become more vertically compliant as the years have passed, but the lateral stiffness is still there for when you need to put the power down.

Must be that massive bottom bracket.
Thanks for the great laughs snob, please continue...

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

Happy Anniversary Snob. The Blog Mitzvah should be in 3 more years to be accurate.

Here's to wishing you at least 10 more years of beyond category blogulating, books, personal appearances and the attendant celebrity!

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Like you, I toyed with all sorts of celebratory possibilities in honor of your 10th. As it turned out it just wasn't worth the effort. Also, if I did something for tou, then my wife would get all up in my face about 'how come you do nice things for Snobby but not for me'? Then I'd say something stupid like 'I like him and he makes me laugh, bot like you.' Then the shot hits the fan.

Thanks for the laughs, Snobby and I love getting the weather in my e mail. It's like I have a friend.

Frickus Rungus said...

Happy 10th Blog-A-Versary!
Thank you for all of the work you have done over the years.
I think that the proper 10th anniversary gift is an aluminum framed fixed gear bike (double diamond frame), with a PBR in the bottle cage. I'll start combing craigslist for a nice one.

Frickus Rungus said...

Wildcat,

Do you want the yellow one or the black one?

Maybe we should just all chip in and get you both!

theEel said...

thanks snob. weed.

Anonymous said...

mazel tov

Anonymous said...

well done. consistently written with the intelligence on par with leroy's dog.

Salvatore Denise said...

thanks Snobby! ur the best! as long as u keep blogging ill keep riding. peace brother. (can u tell im kinda drunk at the moment).

dancesonpedals said...

A half century greeting to the tithe century blog & blogger

Some guy from upstate said...

Happy Snobiversary! This is my favorite blog. Actually it's the only blog I read regularly. The transalt stuff is good too, but I always feel like I'm trespassing. Many thanks.

Anonymous said...

And to think I only came here on advice from Lance. Great work Snobby!

Marsu Pilamus said...

Joyeux anniversaire monsieur le Snob !

A thankful faithful reader. said...

Congrats and Thank You!

I've read you just about every night before beer for many years now. You have made me laugh out loud (always resulting in a reread to my wife!) and make me think. Was a pleasure to meet you in Cleveland a time back. I'll keep reading if you keep writing (and riding!) Cheers Wildcat Tock Machine!

AYHSMB.

JLRB said...

I agree with the above

Your writing captures my lifelong love affair with bicycles but also added a new perspective, and of course the wit keeps me laughing and returning

Here's hoping you Keep writing through the carbon, steel and titanium anniversaries

Anonymous said...

Seems like just yesterday I was eagerly refreshing the page hoping for an update to the Pistadex or a new sign of the impending fixed-gear apocalypse. What a ride, can't wait for the next 10.

der Blaue Reiter said...

What JLRB said! Great laughs and great perspective; thanks!

Old Timer said...

Huh? What?

BeerDrivenCyclist said...

59st?

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Snob. ¡Feliz aniversario desde Barcelona!

McFly said...

You've done well for a guy with stumpy thumbs. Thanks for the laughs and for the record you are still vicariously pissing away company time.

Matt said...

I guess we're even...you were a day late posting, and I am a day late reading. Happy belated Bloggariea day Snobby.

bad boy of the sooth said...

Again,congrats on ten long years.well,onward through the fog.

janinedm said...

Happy Birthday! Can I make a request? There's a Bill in Committee in the NY Senate to make wearing a helmet mandatory in New York City. (As per usual, the apple pickers upstate want to tell us how to go about our own business.) Can you share the link to voice one's opposition? https://www.nysenate.gov/legislation/bills/2017/S6531

Chazu said...

I've been concerned that you were planning to stop blogging here as of your 10th anniversary. Glad to hear that isn't the case.

bieks said...

Speaking of being a day late, how about a 6061 Diamondback bike? Those are BSOs now, right? Sounds about in my price range.

Anonymous said...

Americas, no....The world's greatest blogger. If you make it to twenty I'll get you a used Cippolini off Craigslist.

Anonymous said...

happy belated birthday snob. I've enjoyed this blog for about 9 years, around the time I started my current job. Once I hit 10, I'm going with the last option, quitting the whole shit show but my job sucks. Thanks for all of the laughs over the years. When I started reading this, I was just a casual bike commuter riding around on an old '90s mountain bike. I've gone full circle: single speed commuter, entry level crabon road bike, artisanal titanium road bike, steel everything bike. As you can see I'm very susceptible to the bike marketing leviathan and your blog. Keep up the good work.

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Anonymous said...

A good time to say a sincere thank you - thanks, WCRM for a funny and informative (edutational) blog and your positive influence on cycling (be it sporty or utilitarian).

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